9/24 Confessions #4B

Sin
In Augustine's Confessions, the author spends a lot of time telling his testimony of how he grew up and lived in sin. His view on the effects of his sin and God are much different than that of the Ancient Greeks. Augustine described, that in his childhood, his laziness in his education was one of his sins. He ignored the more important (in his opinion) fundamentals of learning and took more joy out of reading fictional stories like the Aenead and public speaking. His being taught these things (an evil on the educational systems part) and his laziness in subjects that he cared less for, were, according to him, sin. He also struggled with inappropriate sexual relationships in his later years. Augustine admits to ruining marriage and keeping several mistresses. In his later life, this was one of the sins that barred from fully accepting Christ into his life. But Augustine maintains that his sins and agonies were brought on solely by himself. He writes that our loving, all powerful God had only joy in store for him, but he chose to sin for the sake of evil without any external influence. This contrasts with what Ancient Greeks believed that fate unyielding over everything, sometimes giving out blessings and sometimes curses for no reason. To the Greeks, the gods did not particularly love them and that the gods were also under the power of fate. Augustine clearly does not hold these views.

Conversion
Augustine struggled with his own sexual sin at the time of his conversion. As he was trying to get away from the sin in his life, such as separating himself from his mistresses, he often slimmed into pitiable, but sinful think. He felt he that he could not accept Christ because his shame from the things in his life that he knew were sin. Augustine could not fix the sin in his life by himself, he needed Jesus. But his problems made him feel like he was not ready or not worthy, so he would say "just let it be," for his sin and faith. Augustine's thoughts and hindrances in accepting Christ parallel what many people today feel. It is understandable for those know God, but have not accepted his son into their hearts, to fear an unworthiness. We are inferior to God in every way, but as a Christian, I understand that He still wants to have a personal relationship with me. But I am sure many people today, like Augustine did, not worthy enough to enter into a relationship with Him.